lOSt yOU.....

Even today I remember the day we first met,
Such was the experience I could never forget.

Meeting you for me was a new beginning,

Seriously it felt like life’s new inning.

Every day I just wished to see you smile,

I remembered you every once in a while.

 Being with you made me the happiest,

Staying away from you felt like a test.

With you life just got better,

There were no reasons for my thoughts to alter.

Along you any distance I could walk,

There was nothing to you I won’t talk.

You were the one to teach me to love,

Like there was nothing above.

You were the one, who told me what love was,

It was this love in you that made my world pause.

I was about to tell you what’s in my heart,

And become your life’s part.

But never you could understand my feelings,

It’s for you only my heart is still beating.

But before I could say anything,

You went away leaving me with nothing.

Never did you think how hard it would be on me?

Without you in this world how will I be.

You were my life’s most beautiful phase,

A part of me will stay there always.

Never I thought that our ways will ever part,

And never the pain on me it would impart

Every moment I miss you and your voice,

I still don’t know how you made such a choice.

I never could imagine to give you pain,

How much I loved you just can’t explain.

Finally when again I met you,

The person was someone I never knew.

Every word you said was so different,

 I wondered where the person I loved went.

Today I feel everything is finished,

The sense of you with me vanished.

Now with life I need to start everything new,

Because finally I have lost you.....

This one is a bit personal so it's hard for me to describe more. It took a lot of courage to pen down this itself. It really hurts a lot when something like this happens. Only thing that remains is void or emptiness created due to that special one leaving us. But as we all say life goes on so should we move on. I guess for this one the poem is enough and it speaks all. And I wish no one ever has to face such pain and agony. 

whEN THIngs eND....And yOU DOnt contROL THe flOW

When I see you all there is only one feeling that is pain,
But I don’t know if we will ever get together again.

I still remember us when our friendship was new,

At that time people I knew around were very few.

Life was great to be with all of you,

Whenever I got alone to be with me was one of you.

I always thanked god for giving me such great friends,

On whom I could always depend.

Now I had nothing to fear,

Because you all were near.

But then I don’t know exactly what happened,

To everything there was a sudden end.

For sometime everything seemed meaningless,

Everything around was in a mess.

All around me was shattered,

Every piece of life was scattered.

You all were just gone,

I was left there on my own all alone.

Since then I’m trying to find what went wrong,

Why couldn’t we get along?

First I thought the fault was mine,

May be I would have crossed some line.

But friendship is not something which lines define,

I feel it’s about being genuine.

I tried a lot to get back,

But never could I fill that crack.

Daily I saw you & you won’t give a look,

I felt like a fish in a hook.

Seeing you around I would give a stare,

Such intense was the pain I couldn’t share.

I had to prove my very own existence,

Since then between us grew the distance.

But I had no other choice,

You would never notice the pain in my voice.

Whatever happened I acted strong,

I knew walking alone the distance will be long.

I guess now it’s over and I won’t persist,

But one last word to you all ‘ I exist ‘.

You would have already understood from the poem above what I'm talking about. No more words are needed to describe it. Still, you want something more, here it is.


This is how we feel when we loose the most cared people in our life. Atleast I felt so, when I lost them. Some stay right infront of you and remind you of the pain every time you see them, while some go away beyond our reach and cause more pain because then we miss an important part of our lives. There is a lot of pain in all this but people don't notice. They are usually delusional about materialistic pleasures and forget about human feelings. Or they consider your feelings not worth it. But let me tell you every god darn human's feelings are important if not to one person definitely to others. It's just the amount of respect one has for someone's feelings.


I have only personal advice to everyone who has gone through this kind of pain is remember the days when they were with you, it would give you immense happiness and satisfaction. But don't be too hard on yourself. One thing I learnt is to let go, though it has been very difficult it but to save myself from further destruction I had to do it.

EArth izz maRS....& WE ARe marTIANS

Everyday I be with YOU,

Person best I think I know is YOU.

Everytime I look at YOU,

Person I feel I understand is YOU.

Every moment I think of YOU,

Person I find I get along is YOU.

But sometimes when I see YOU,

The one I knowledge is not YOU,
               My HEART asks WHO ARE YOU ???????                            

How many times you have felt that YOU DONNO THE PERSON YOU THOUGHT KNEW THE MOST & ALL ABOUT. C'mon this happens with us at some point or the other , doesn't it ? It does whether you agree or not.


Now coming to the title of this post "EArth izz maRS....& WE ARe marTIANS". Let me remind you about a few science facts (a bit of gyaan). In todays high-tech world, we have reached in outer space and going to other planets for search of conditions suitable for 'LIFE' and find if life already exists there. The planets which fascinates the scientists the most and whose so called 'CITIZENS' has been an inspiration for many Hollywood epics in the past & continues to do so, ladies & gentlemen , I present to you the MARS and its certified 'CITIZENS' MARTIANS. Enough of this fun, lets get a bit serious.

We have gone that far to find out about life, when we don't know whats there on earth completely. Leave alone life (or forms of life) on Mars, we don't know about ourselves, we the humans. The thing that is still to be understood is our behavior. We are still confused about its way of working, how it reacts to situations, how it differs from one person to the other. We are aliens, not the real ones, the human aliens. So here we are, Earth is itself Mars and we are Martians.


Lets come down to individual level, as friends, parents, ralatives we consider that we know about someone's behavior. But is that true ? No, its not possible to know everything about someone. Lets take a case of your 'BEST BUDDY'. You and your friend claims (or atleast one of you do) that you know everything about him/her. But that claim is not true at all. Some day, something happens and your brain gives you a question you would have never liked to think about. The question is "Do I really know this person ?". This question arises in our mind when your friend does something you never in your life expected or even thought he/she would do. That action of his took you totally by surprise and you were sort of dumb struck. You think that I've been with this person for so long, I knew him/her for so many years and blah blah blah!!!.... How could he even do or behave like this. Same is the case with Parents-Kin and other relations.


So, here we stand at the grass root level, not knowing the closest person to us completely. So think about it that how many MARTIANS have increased in your life after the question "Do I know this person ?". Happy thinking.

i @m HaPpY !!!!

Each day I pretend I'm happy,

Like there's nothing wrong with me
My smile and laugh look flawless,
But this pain you wouldn't believe.

My bones ache from the pressure,
That I have put upon myself
To be something so plastic -
I just wish someone would help.

Can you forget my face,
Just erase me from your head
I don't want to disgrace you,
I would much rather be dead......

I am happy!!! I’m good man!!! I’m okay!!! Everything's good!!! There’s nothing wrong!!! I’m alright.....What can ever happen to me....

These are the so called 'STATEMENTS' people give, you give, I give many a times even though nothing’s alright, you are not happy, there’s nothing good going on, everything is wrong, life's worst than hell, the situation is out of control, you have no reason to even smile. But still you put on a brave face and a genuine smile (actually fake), showing nothing to the world, not a single tear, not even a single stress mark on their faces. It's actually hard to hide your feelings when you are in public, but the one's who still manage to go unnoticed are the masters of this art.

This happen infront of us daily with some or the other person. You don't bother about them, until it's your friend or classmate or colleague. As we usually are, you feel about it only when it gets personal, right ??? Even though you bother or atleast try to show that you do bother, you ask that person about it once or twice and then leave him on his own. Thats may be because you either actually don't care about that person or you think that you are not the person who should be dealing with it.

Lets take the case that you asked a couple of times and then left. You know that the person infront of you is in some trouble but you give up and leave. But have you ever wondered that why that person doesn't reveal anything about his trouble, emotions and not ready to confide to you ? Let me guess you never went that deep !!!! Lets be optimistic, you thought about it once and the immediate answer your head gives is " may be there is something he doesn't wanna tell and he'll get over it sooner or later ".

Now let me tell you about a specific group of people who don't show their feelings to anyone. These people are normal persons like you and me, the things that distinguishes them is their thinking. Whenever something bad happens they tend to go into a shell, blocking or atleast try to, anything they think can hurt their confidence, self respect, etc.  These people hold their emotions back, expressing nothing. They behave like 'REAL DUDES' from outside, the tough guys, who don't give a damn about the world and what people think. But actually they are weak inside (most of them). Some are really strong, but the thing wrong about them is that they think they don't need others, they can handle anything easily. This is where they go wrong. Now coming to the reasons they do it. They fear that if they reveal their problems, emotions to others, people might just make fun of it. They think it's better to keep it to themselves. They do want you to come and ask, but fear to speak out. They fear that their emotions may not get the respect they should get.

These people consider themselves alone, trusting hardly anyone. So guys n gals go grab buddies "WHO ARE HAPPY!!!" and assure them that you are always their for them. Gain their trust, but never break it. 

i W@lK aLonE....

I walk a lonely road

The only one that I have ever known

Don't know where it goes

But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street

On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Where the city sleeps

and I'm the only one and I walk alone

                    

These lines from GREEN DAY inspire me to write this post. 


How many times in a day do you feel that you are alone ? 'Alone' here, doesn't mean that you are alone in a room or house. What I'm trying to ask is, how many times do you feel from inside, when a voice in you says that you have noone with you ? Even though you are standing in a crowd of thousands, you still feel alone. It happens atleast once a day with us, whether you agree with it or not, it's upto you. Let me tell you I get that feeling atleast 24 times in a day, once in every hour of the day. 


This feeling is there when you are away from home, away from your comfort zone, away from family. This feeling of being alone takes over you and your thinking methodology.  The feeling gains prominence when you are with a group of people and you are being ignored (knowingly or unknowingly) or when your existence is not considered. This feeling gets deeper inside as time passes, & finally you break out, not being able to bear it. These people get better slowly.


In some cases, people hold this feeling inside them and never tell anything about it. The worst thing about this feeling is,that it gives you a sinking kind of feeling. You start feeling weak from inside. You feel tired, disheartened and ya 'ALONE'. These kind of people move away from that group or situation silently or thinking that they will be fine but they suffer from this sinking feeling daily and it gets more intense. After moving away they suffer more by seeing those people again and again. They also have an emotional outburst (never in public). They try to work out of this by keeping themselves busy, occupied and do things that give them materialistic happiness and nothing more. But all the while they try to work it out, they get deeper into the feeling. They loose concentration over work. They hardly get a smile on their face (a smile that comes from inside). These people become the lonely walkers in life. I call them the 'CRUSADERS' of life. They are the one's who really "WALK ALONE". 


I humbly request to you all, that if you know any of the lonely walker, please get them back before they go missing. Most of these people are whom you failed to recognise.